Things are still going very well. I suspect some of this has to do with the fact that we have to get H enrolled into school. First we were waiting on the placement agreement from her work, then my worker, then her worker, you get the picture. We got that first thing yesterday morning, but her previous school hasn't yet faxed over the transcripts to the new school, and that's the last thing we're working on.
While we wait, there's been lots of me working at home (thankfully I can do this for a little while longer) and her watching TV or playing on the Xbox. Neither of which bother me or my husband too much, since we know she needs the relaxing time to settle into the house, she's respectful of time and hasn't been demanding in anyway. And when she DOES start school, we know she's going to be a little overwhelmed time-wise as she works to catch up and then dives proper-like into classes/assignments/ect.
So far, the biggest frustration has been waiting on paperwork - like an open-ended form so that we can take her five minutes away (across state lines). It seems like such a small thing, but all our family lives on the other side of that state line that's just a few minutes from our house. So, we have to have that form before we could legally take her just about anywhere we wanted to go - and we didn't get that until late Monday afternoon, which made that first weekend a little frustrating.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Thursday, August 18, 2011
The First Kid: H
So, yesterday, one of the workers at our agency, sent us two referrals - two teenage girls. Both of them seemed acceptable to us, so we asked about the first one. She's a foster-to-adopt opportunity, so we were more willing to try that out (since ultimately we'd like to adopt).
She's 15 (half my age) and though I've only spent a few hours with her, she seems like a generally good and good-natured kid. From the paperwork I've gone through, it looks like her previous foster parents may have been on the strict and conservative side of things - and this girl has been sexually active for a few years, so it looks like that was a problem for them.
My husband and I feel much less strange about that sort of thing - it's a generational and moral belief difference obviously, but we feel pretty well equipped to handle it.
Yesterday all-in-all was a pretty strange day. The request for placement came early, but the call that she was coming to us, took a few hours. Then, she's coming from halfway across the state, so we had to wait for a worker to drive her to us (about 4 hours I think). So she came in late last night, and arrived with a LOT of things, which I hadn't been expecting.
Right now, things have gone well. She seems eager to please - maybe a little more so than is normal - we're told there can be a sort of 'honeymoon' phase with some kids where they'll fit in well and be eager to please, and then start testing once they feel more comfortable. Since she's not from the area, we're going to have to take a few days to get her enrolled in school and everything.
It's awkward right now - or I feel like it is - I don't want to hover. And I know I can't 'make' her feel comfortable, but I think that she's adjusting well.
She's 15 (half my age) and though I've only spent a few hours with her, she seems like a generally good and good-natured kid. From the paperwork I've gone through, it looks like her previous foster parents may have been on the strict and conservative side of things - and this girl has been sexually active for a few years, so it looks like that was a problem for them.
My husband and I feel much less strange about that sort of thing - it's a generational and moral belief difference obviously, but we feel pretty well equipped to handle it.
Yesterday all-in-all was a pretty strange day. The request for placement came early, but the call that she was coming to us, took a few hours. Then, she's coming from halfway across the state, so we had to wait for a worker to drive her to us (about 4 hours I think). So she came in late last night, and arrived with a LOT of things, which I hadn't been expecting.
Right now, things have gone well. She seems eager to please - maybe a little more so than is normal - we're told there can be a sort of 'honeymoon' phase with some kids where they'll fit in well and be eager to please, and then start testing once they feel more comfortable. Since she's not from the area, we're going to have to take a few days to get her enrolled in school and everything.
It's awkward right now - or I feel like it is - I don't want to hover. And I know I can't 'make' her feel comfortable, but I think that she's adjusting well.
Monday, August 15, 2011
We're Official
Our official walkthrough went amazingly well. There's always horror stories about how hard it is to pass on the first time without a bunch of corrections. We had two minor things that she didn't count us off for, just mentioned that we'll want to take care of those things before we get placements at the ages where they would matter. She wrote them down, but they won't stop us from getting our 0-18 license.
What I liked is that even though our worker did the same thing - this lady was able to sit down with me and talk me through all the regulations (or groups of regulations) and when I asked questions she had good answers, which our worker doesn't always have. They each have their strengths, but when talking about regulations specifically, this was very helpful to me - and will be helpful later as we actually start taking placements.
So, that all said, we're official and our license should come in the mail very soon.
We have started receiving some emails about placements. We tried to take two different girls (both older, one 11, one 17) but both were placed before we responded. We've had several other emails about other kids, mostly boys that we've turned down for one reason or another. For our first placement specifically, my husband and I are really, really trying to find someone that's a good fit for us, not just take the first kid that comes along. It's a little stressful thinking I can't help all of these kids but I'd rather say no up front than have to tell the agency we can't handle a kid and they have to go back. These kids have so much upset in their lives, I feel like that would be worse than not taking them at all.
What I liked is that even though our worker did the same thing - this lady was able to sit down with me and talk me through all the regulations (or groups of regulations) and when I asked questions she had good answers, which our worker doesn't always have. They each have their strengths, but when talking about regulations specifically, this was very helpful to me - and will be helpful later as we actually start taking placements.
So, that all said, we're official and our license should come in the mail very soon.
We have started receiving some emails about placements. We tried to take two different girls (both older, one 11, one 17) but both were placed before we responded. We've had several other emails about other kids, mostly boys that we've turned down for one reason or another. For our first placement specifically, my husband and I are really, really trying to find someone that's a good fit for us, not just take the first kid that comes along. It's a little stressful thinking I can't help all of these kids but I'd rather say no up front than have to tell the agency we can't handle a kid and they have to go back. These kids have so much upset in their lives, I feel like that would be worse than not taking them at all.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Foster Care Updates
Since our social worker came back from her temporary leave, things have moved at a head-spinningly quick clip. Our temporary license for Foster Care arrived two weeks ago. Then, last week, as the husband and I were packing up for a small vacation, we got the call for our official inspection. Traditionally (and our temp. license paperwork said something to this effect) the time between temporary licensing and the official inspection by the health department can take 60 - 90 days. But, we suspect since it's so close to the beginning of a new school year, they're trying to speed up the process right now.
Or maybe they just have nothing better to do. If that means we get through the process faster - so be it.
So, our inspection is tomorrow and thank goodness there's jut a bit of cleaning/organizing to do to get ready for such a thing.
In the mean time, we've also been reviewing placement opportunities. We said yes to one - a respite care option for a couple of days next week - but it's already fallen through. We're considering a few others right now. (Which I should probably respond to today.)
On top of that, our social worker was also able to gain some traction on a few of the adoption options we talked about long before she went on leave. We're trying to press forward with one girl (11) at the moment, though of course as we're interested - so is another family. So, I don't know what's going to happen there, but I'm hopeful.
Or maybe they just have nothing better to do. If that means we get through the process faster - so be it.
So, our inspection is tomorrow and thank goodness there's jut a bit of cleaning/organizing to do to get ready for such a thing.
In the mean time, we've also been reviewing placement opportunities. We said yes to one - a respite care option for a couple of days next week - but it's already fallen through. We're considering a few others right now. (Which I should probably respond to today.)
On top of that, our social worker was also able to gain some traction on a few of the adoption options we talked about long before she went on leave. We're trying to press forward with one girl (11) at the moment, though of course as we're interested - so is another family. So, I don't know what's going to happen there, but I'm hopeful.
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